The Toronto International Film Festival (TIFF), takes place early in September and is host to the world premiere of Fubar 2.  A sequel to the 2002 Canadian Movie which these two reprobates are desperate to see.

Stan & Jorgie request FUBAR from vidwerk on Vimeo.

Somehow Stan and Jorgie have even managed to work a computer and write something down for them:

Jorgie’s words to FUBAR2:

You men are kings on mayhem! Canadian icons that have been borne to live off the spoils of culture. We’d love to make an interview with you, together, in Toronto! We would make spots in our schedules to come to your premier, on the merit of our film site hosts, filmchair.com. GIV’R!

Much love to brethren Terry & Deaner!

~ Jorgie, Film Professional

We need ya Deaner and Terry. We need ya on the Stan and Jorgie show. Why?

Let me tell yall a story about Jooper and Helga.

Jooper was a perpetually constipated shoe salesman in Trout Creek Ontario. Helga was a hopeless romantic who recited poetry all day while making some damn fine food native to her South Carolina roots. She was madly in-love with Jooper and was convinced a constant diet of sounthern bbq was the cure to being clogged.

If you’re wondering what the hell they’re on about check out the trailer for Fubar 2:

Will the take them up on their request? We’ll keep you posted.

Yeah, us too.  Well luckily for you we recently found two absurd characters who claim to be “film professionals” and who fancied having a go at reviewing a classic film for us.

Inspired by our Dude-Drink-a-thon Filmchair is, a-hem, proud to present Stan & Jorgie at the Movies.

The Movie: Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas

An adaptation of Hunter S. Thompson’s novel of the same name. The film details a whacky search for the “American Dream”, by Thompson and his crazed, Samoan lawyer. Fueled by the massive amount of drugs they purchased with an advance from a magazine to cover a sporting event in Vegas; they set out in the Red Shark. Encountering police, reporters, gamblers, racers, and hitchhikers; they search for some undefinable thing know only as the “American Dream” and find fear, loathing and hilarious adventures into the dementia of the modern American West.

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The Rules:

Nice and simple really, every time a drug is taken on screen, these bozos have to have a drink.

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The Result:

Stan and Jorgie at the Movies from vidwerk on Vimeo.

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Now just in case you didn’t understand a word they were saying they’ve also provided us with a written review of the film.

10. Dont say a word.

I have to start with this for the simple reason I hated it. The film is great and he is awesome in the film but there is a scene that will ruin the film but if you have seen it, Mr. Bean would have won. Also staring the late Brittany Murphy this film will stick with you for a while.

9. You Me and Dupree

playing the father in law in this film was not his biggest part but surely one of his most fun ones. Worth a watch just because it is a really great film.

8. The Sentinel

Douglas teams up with 24 star Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland) to be a body guard to one of the most important men in the world, but somehow it all goes wrong. A great suspense thriller.

7. Romancing the Stone

when a romance writer is kidnapped her sister goes after her to pay the ransom she finds herself in an adventure and treasure hunt which will lead to fun, danger and maybe a hint of love. Danny Devito also stars in this truly 80’s Saturday afternoon flick.

6. Fatal Attraction

when on a business trip a man meets a girl in the bar, takes her back for a one night stand. Then all of a sudden he find out the bird is totally mental, stalks the hell out of him and ruins his life, a woman’s scorn and all that! Welcome to the world of the bunny boiler mate, enjoy the film but leave with the correct partner.

5.Disclosure

One of many sexual orientated films disclosure is an adaptation of Michael Crichton novel. A computer specialist is sued for sexual harassment by a former lover turned boss who initiated the act forcefully, which threatens both his career and his personal life

4. Traffic

Although not really sharing any screen time this film with his wife set the Oscars alight at the turn of the century. Steven Soderbergh directed Douglas as a DEA in a twisting and intriguing look at the North American drug trade.

3.Basic Instinct

every young man of my age has heard of this film. Now Mike is in it a lot but it is more about the female lead, and the fact most of the picture she is nude. Great film, with a touch of art imitating life, but we wont go in to that in this tribute. It also contains cinema history but see if you can spot that when the moment happens.

2. Falling Down

when you having a bad day, and you think this person is pissing me off. Today I was stuck behind this guy driving really slowly, and it made me mad. However I didn’t snap, what if I did? Would I go on a rampage? This guy did!

1. Wall Street

Annoyingly this film took 23 years to get a sequel. The original boosts the father and son act of Charlie and Martin Sheen, but it is Michael Douglas as Gordon Gekko that everyone remembers. His finest moment and a great film, although these lists are never a real countdown, if you want to see why this article exists it is simple because of Wall Street. I am sure it inspired almost every stock trader since the late 80’s ! it also won him his only Oscar for acting after his win for Best Picture for One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest.

A loan officer, ordered to evict an old woman from her home, finds herself the recipient of a supernatural curse, which turns her life into a living hell. Desperate, she turns to a seer to try to save her soul, while evil forces work to push her to breaking point.

Now I have to be honest when I tell you that horror films are not my cup of tea. If I watch crime watch on the BBC 1 I will be up all night scared that I am going to be robbed, home invaded, at gun point then attack as I walked home from work all in the space of 20 minutes. So I sat down with this little movie thinking and dreading the worse.

What I got was in fact a surprise, this film did give me the willy’s and at times had me scared out of my wits, but it was not your typical make them jump at any moment film. The story was quick to get to the point and the evil characters really did leave you feeling uncomfortable at every opportunity.

It padded out slowly and had some real twists and turns along the way. Alison Lohman makes the whole film look great as she has this girl next door sweetness about her, with a hidden side of revenge when she needs it. Over all I would think true horror fans would be let down by this but for those who like to dip their toes in then sit back with the covers ready to hide under!

It has been nearly a week since I went to see this film. Funny way to start a review I know, and it is taking me quite a while to get this far into it. The problem, I get very angry every time I think of this disgrace of a tale. If you want to make a movie about medieval England do it, just don’t associate it with a folk law hero who has a place in the heart of every Englishman carefully placed next to the St. Swithins Day speech from Henry V.

The video above is the St. Swithins speech, we normally place the film we are reviewing there but this can be found below. How did it go wrong? First of all, I had to sit through what felt like several hours commercials, followed up by Matthew Horne in his shirt button to the top telling me in the most feeble voice how lots of people rely on the money from films to live and don’t pirate it. Then they show a Hollywood version of a British legend with no British cast. Mr. Scott? Why did you do it?

There is no need to tell you about the brilliant accents that float around, ranging from Irish, to Australian, then to a grumble from down under and back to top o’the morning to ya, all provided from Mr. Hood himself. But even the fairest maiden in the land, Lady Marion was an Australian.

But then you get to the actual film, the slow drawn out non epic that it was. If you enjoy tourist video’s where they put a camera on a helicopter and fly over a forest, then some mountains while playing some folk song, you’re going to love this. Robin hood has always been about great arrows, big fights with little John and his staff and jokes from the friar, which never happens. The one battle scene is good but if you blink then you will have missed it.

Poor effort and please do not disgrace your selves with a sequel.

~review by Alex

Featuring over 100 amazing super cars including; a gold-plated $1.8 million Bugatti Veyron, custom Rolls Royce Phantoms, the world’s fastest production car, the SSC Aero, the latest Nissan GT-R, Maximillion’s ultra rare Jaguar XJ220S, and more Ferraris, McLaren SLRs, Aston Martins, Bentleys, and Lamborghinis than you’ve ever seen before, makes this an automobile must see for car lovers everywhere.

So buckle up alongside; NBA bad boy Dennis Rodman, MTV Dirty Sanchez ‘s Matt Pritchard, the fire breathing Fuel Girls, Cypress Hill’s DJ Muggs, rock band Avenged Sevenfold, skateboarding supremo Tony Hawk, supermodel Caprice, British indie band The Enemy, and UAE Royal Sheikh Mohammed Al Thani as they drive, party and endure 3000 grueling miles!

The release of the DVD coincides with the start of the 2010 rally and we were lucky enough to be there when the flag dropped.  Here’s some pics, click to make a bit bigger.

Vanko is out for revenge as he believes that Stark’s family stole his fathers ideas.  He eventually teams up with Justin Hammer (Sam Rockwell), a rival weapons manufacturer to try to defeat Iron Man and destroy the Stark’s legacy once and for all.

The problem with superhero sequels, is they always feel they have to be bigger and bolder than the first.  Sometimes it works, Spiderman 2 being a great example, and sometimes they just throw in too many characters and it fails massively, Spiderman 3 or Batman & Robin anyone?  So I watched Iron Man 2 with some trepidation.

From the trailers alone you know you’ve got a hell of a lot of characters thrown into the mix, Whiplash (Mickey Rourke), War Machine (Don Cheadle), Black Cat (Scarlet Johansson), Nick Fury (Samuel L Jackson) and Sam Rockwell eating up the scenery as Justin Hammer.  Character overload?  Well luckily no.  It does lengthen the story somewhat and distract you from just being able to enjoy Robert Downey Jr’s Stark but it certainly can’t stifle what is an action packed and thoroughly enjoyable sequel.

As well as develop Iron Man and all that comes with him (War Machine, Whiplash, Pepper Pots), the writers squeezed in many references to The Avengers.  And it’s whilst incorporating these bits the story feels a bit convoluted and the pace is affected but as soon as Sam Rockwell dances across the stage at the Stark Expo things get quickly back on track for an action packed climax.

A thoroughly enjoyable sequel.  I’m still not sure if it’s better than the first but it’s certainly as good as it.

A big thanks once again to Sky Movies HD for getting us into the gala screening which would have been the world premiere if it was for that damn volcano.

This is the first feature length work from the writing directing partnership of Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant. Trying to recapture the essence of The Office in a semi autobiographic view of Ricky’s life this film meanders its way along at a slow whimsical pace with not a lot going on. With the feeling of a long build up to an energetic end that never materialises it does leave you a little quizzical to why you just sat through what felt like a prequel to Last of the Summer Wine.

The writing duo have one magic aspect with most projects they work on, finding new British talent, which means there is no preconception or expectation from the characters. With a couple of cameos thrown in for good measure from Merchant and Gervais and a stellar performance from Ralph Fiennes the acting is well managed.

So what about the actual story? Based in the Reading area which made some people in the cinema I was in laugh, mainly because we were in Reading. It sees 3 odd ball mates whose sole purpose is to get work done, then go out on the beers, maybe have a fight, get home most likely after a sleep in the cells for good measure. One of them though is getting to the age where more is needed, he feels like life is passing him by and needs to make a break from the comforts of home.

Just like decades of American style movies which normally contain funnier moments or are action packed rather then a British comedy this is a true coming of age tale. Don’t get me wrong there are a couple of funny moments or one liners, with a very rude joke about Noddy thrown in for good measure, it Just felt like it was missing something.

So what’s this feature about, you guessed it, Democracy, and 9 films people vote in. Some are good, some are very bad and some only really make the list on a technicality. So here goes:

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9. Welcome to Mooseport.

This one only made the list as I could only find 9 and at a stretch that 9 includes one of the worst films ever, so bad Gene Hackman retired from acting due to this poor effort and stain on his career (this is a joke and he may not have thought these things so please don’t sue me). But as a family movie take the funny guy from Raymond, put the same character into a film about a small town, add a mayoral race and hope that hilarity ensues…… it doesn’t.

Even the gag reel isn’t that bloody funny

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8.  Ali G in Da House

Now here comes a man with a mission, his mission is to save the John Nike Leisure Centre, and he will take this issue right to the top. The nation fell in love with this self proclaimed gangster of Staines way before most of America had heard of Borat or Bruno. Sacha Baron Cohen takes us on a comedy beat boxing, blunt smoking hip hopping journey to Downing Street aided by other slough local Martin Freeman fresh out of Wernhom Hogg. The film is what it is meant to be, totally stupid, but well worth a watch.

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7. Canadian Bacon

For a strange amount of time in my life I have been compared to John Candy, I think it must be because I am a funny guy but can not be totally sure that this is the case. But this is an outing which should not be missed, when the President of the USA is low in the election poles there is only one thing to do, and that’s get the nation behind him with a cold war. But a real war is expensive and then you have to get there, so why not just go to war with Canada? Niagara Falls USA Sheriff does not take this threat lightly and goes to nip this in the bud quickly on the other side of the river.

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6. Dave

Bit of an odd one but it does make sense for a family movie. The president of the USA ends up in a coma, to prevent scandal and keep the status quo for the country, they find a look a like. Unlike when the queen appears in a film this actually looks like him and will pass a Sunday afternoon.

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5. The Manchurian Candidate

Either versions of this film are great. But really the original should be the one to watch as it has probably the best acting performance from Old Blue Eyes, Frank Sinatra. The Russians (remember we use to have Russians as the villains before you know who with the airplanes) brain wash the man so when he hears the trigger words, he pulls his trigger and the president bites the dust! Great suspense. Excuse the strange trailer too, but it sums it up.

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4. Angels and Demons

This one is a cheeky little entry, but does mark the first entry for the Papacy, but you didn’t think there would be more then one. When in the prequel to The DaVinci Code our hero Robert Langdon has to solve all sorts of clues while priests are getting a right beat down across the city of Rome. In the middle of all this kayos the cardinals of the Catholic Church are voting for who should become the new leader, The Pope.

Not many laughs and a couple of dodgy hair cuts later we have this Ron Howard classic.

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3. Napoleon Dynamite

Geeks everywhere rejoiced when the king of the nerds stood up to everyone and helped a crazy Mexican out with a school election. Napoleon is the ultimate awkward geek that is so uncool, but some how he manages to win the hearts of the audience and everyone in this film. Creating 2 great things, firstly ‘Vote for Pedro’ tshirts everywhere but also this scene, enjoy:

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2. Milk

A last minute thought moved this off the number 1 spot but the film about gay rights activist Harvey Milk Created made history by creating a Homosexual safe area in San Francisco. Once this was complete there was only one way he could get his movement noticed with more prominence, and address this issue of gay rights. Obviously the majority of people did not like the idea too much but Milk kept his cool and kept going.

This Biopic won Sean Penn and Oscar, and is a great tribute to an American activist of the 60’s.

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1. The Pope Must Die

Before Harry Potter’s Hagrid, there was Cracker. Before Cracker, there was the Pope! Robbie Coltrane has been in two remember able performances as a religious figure, one was a Nun, in Nuns on the run, the other was a Boozing Womanising priest, who would quite by mistake go on to lead the millions of Catholics world wide in your number 1 film:

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~Feature By Alex

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