Election Melt Down

The UK is currently in a frenzy of boring news stories, baby kissing, hand shaking and Party Political Broadcasting all because these muckers with a capital F are vying for our votes. Now it is important that if you live in the UK you get a vote in, doesn’t matter who it is for but make your voice heard. - there will never be another boring statement like that.

So what’s this feature about, you guessed it, Democracy, and 9 films people vote in. Some are good, some are very bad and some only really make the list on a technicality. So here goes:

.

.

9. Welcome to Mooseport.

This one only made the list as I could only find 9 and at a stretch that 9 includes one of the worst films ever, so bad Gene Hackman retired from acting due to this poor effort and stain on his career (this is a joke and he may not have thought these things so please don’t sue me). But as a family movie take the funny guy from Raymond, put the same character into a film about a small town, add a mayoral race and hope that hilarity ensues…… it doesn’t.

Even the gag reel isn’t that bloody funny

.

8.  Ali G in Da House

Now here comes a man with a mission, his mission is to save the John Nike Leisure Centre, and he will take this issue right to the top. The nation fell in love with this self proclaimed gangster of Staines way before most of America had heard of Borat or Bruno. Sacha Baron Cohen takes us on a comedy beat boxing, blunt smoking hip hopping journey to Downing Street aided by other slough local Martin Freeman fresh out of Wernhom Hogg. The film is what it is meant to be, totally stupid, but well worth a watch.

.

.

7. Canadian Bacon

For a strange amount of time in my life I have been compared to John Candy, I think it must be because I am a funny guy but can not be totally sure that this is the case. But this is an outing which should not be missed, when the President of the USA is low in the election poles there is only one thing to do, and that’s get the nation behind him with a cold war. But a real war is expensive and then you have to get there, so why not just go to war with Canada? Niagara Falls USA Sheriff does not take this threat lightly and goes to nip this in the bud quickly on the other side of the river.

.

.

6. Dave

Bit of an odd one but it does make sense for a family movie. The president of the USA ends up in a coma, to prevent scandal and keep the status quo for the country, they find a look a like. Unlike when the queen appears in a film this actually looks like him and will pass a Sunday afternoon.

.

.

.

5. The Manchurian Candidate

Either versions of this film are great. But really the original should be the one to watch as it has probably the best acting performance from Old Blue Eyes, Frank Sinatra. The Russians (remember we use to have Russians as the villains before you know who with the airplanes) brain wash the man so when he hears the trigger words, he pulls his trigger and the president bites the dust! Great suspense. Excuse the strange trailer too, but it sums it up.

.

.

4. Angels and Demons

This one is a cheeky little entry, but does mark the first entry for the Papacy, but you didn’t think there would be more then one. When in the prequel to The DaVinci Code our hero Robert Langdon has to solve all sorts of clues while priests are getting a right beat down across the city of Rome. In the middle of all this kayos the cardinals of the Catholic Church are voting for who should become the new leader, The Pope.

Not many laughs and a couple of dodgy hair cuts later we have this Ron Howard classic.

.

.

3. Napoleon Dynamite

Geeks everywhere rejoiced when the king of the nerds stood up to everyone and helped a crazy Mexican out with a school election. Napoleon is the ultimate awkward geek that is so uncool, but some how he manages to win the hearts of the audience and everyone in this film. Creating 2 great things, firstly ‘Vote for Pedro’ tshirts everywhere but also this scene, enjoy:

.
..

.

.

2. Milk

A last minute thought moved this off the number 1 spot but the film about gay rights activist Harvey Milk Created made history by creating a Homosexual safe area in San Francisco. Once this was complete there was only one way he could get his movement noticed with more prominence, and address this issue of gay rights. Obviously the majority of people did not like the idea too much but Milk kept his cool and kept going.

This Biopic won Sean Penn and Oscar, and is a great tribute to an American activist of the 60’s.

.

.

.

1. The Pope Must Die

Before Harry Potter’s Hagrid, there was Cracker. Before Cracker, there was the Pope! Robbie Coltrane has been in two remember able performances as a religious figure, one was a Nun, in Nuns on the run, the other was a Boozing Womanising priest, who would quite by mistake go on to lead the millions of Catholics world wide in your number 1 film:

.

.

~Feature By Alex

.

.

.